4 Ways to Save Your Marriage (Prevent Divorce or Separation)

Go Here Now,To Save Your Marriage!

— 4 Ways to Save Marriage
Whether your spouse has told you that they’re no longer happy, or you’re simply suspecting that they may soon calls it quits, I’m here to tell you how you can single handedly save your marriage.

My name is Brad Browning, I’m a relationship coach, marriage expert, and author of the best-selling Mend the Marriage program. Over the years I’ve worked with many individuals wanting to save their marriage, and one thing I’ve repeatedly encountered is the common belief that one spouse cannot do it alone. Well, I’m here to tell you otherwise. In fact, I have seen many marriages saved when one of the partners takes action – even if the other has refused to keep trying.

Today I’m going to share with you four ways to save your marriage on your own.

Number 1: Accept the Situation

It’s perfectly normal to have a hard time accepting that your spouse feels the way they do. And a common reaction is trying to convince them that things can get better. However, this is actually the worst thing you can do in your situation.

As tempting as it may be, crying and begging for your spouse to give your marriage another chance will not change their mind. Reacting to the news angrily also won’t help. Since your spouse is already past the point of believing change is possible, your desperation will have no impact on your them. Instead, these types of reactions will make you appear weak and out of control.

If you want to save your marriage, you will not get there through pity, cruel words, or dramatic actions. It’s okay for your spouse to know that you’re upset about the situation, but it’s more important for them to know that you have control of your feelings.

To save your marriage you need to accept the situation and acknowledge that you played a role in creating your marital problems.

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53 thoughts on “4 Ways to Save Your Marriage (Prevent Divorce or Separation)

  1. Hi brad. I’ve spoke with you before and wanted to give you an update. Married 15 yrs. We have been separated for 7 mos now. We have been dating for the past 4 mos and all of our get togethers have been great. However he emailed me yesterday and is not wanting to reconcile and says he is ready to officially end the marriage. However he still wants to take me to a Garth Brooks concert next weekend that he had previously purchased tickets for before the email. I was feeling hopeful bc things were going so well. Now what? I feel like my heart has been shattered all over again. 😔 I haven’t been able to eat or sleep. Should I go to the concert and have a good time like we have been doing? Does he feel guilty and that’s why he wants to take me only to drop me afterwards. I don’t know how much more my heart can take. I’ve tried the no contact but he always contacts me and asked me to get together. I would and then wouldn’t hear anything for another week or two. Now wants a divorce.

    1. +Stacy Phelps Hello Stacey, I’m sorry but I can’t backtrack even if I want to. The tons of messages I get daily on here should justify that enough. Anyway what’s happening here, unfortunately, is you letting him run the show and giving all your power to him. Try to stand your ground and let him miss you and see what happens. By the way…I’m curious as to how you were able to cut off contact since I thought you were married. Do you not live together anymore? Do us both a favour and sign up for my coaching program so I can get a better picture of what’s happening and therefore be able to help assess your situation clearly, look at all the other factors at play and see things you might have missed, then guide you accordingly on a regular, ongoing basis at www.breakupbrad.com/coaching

  2. Hiya Brad

    (not relevant to marriage, hope that’s okay)

    I’ve grew up with this girl, and as you probably see it coming… I believe I love her. But after knowing her so long I genuinely don’t know how she feels about me. Shes always flirted with me and she gets jealous of me with other girls. It’s been routine to be in this ‘friendzone’ you might call it. it’s been years, I just want to be with her. The urges are getting the best of me and I don’t want to become desperate. I’ve had loads of gfs and she’s had no bfs, and none of them have compared to her. I’m bored of being with girls I don’t like, I want to be with her, I want to be loyal to her. But I have no idea what to do (I work with her btw) do I tell her how I feel? Do I kiss her? Do I use no contact? We’re very close. I hope this is enough info for you or not too much.

    Thank you

    1. +Jake Hardman Hey Jake, if you want to be loyal to her, she first needs to know how you feel about her. Otherwise, you’re living in a fantasy world you’ve created for yourself. So go spend time with her and let stuff develop naturally, okay? You can’t expect a girl to like you if you don’t even make an effort to see her, so arrange a get-together and just focus on having fun without expecting a lot of things. 🙂 Good luck!

  3. hey brad, i know it is off topic but i have been together with my ex for 6 months, she broke up with me because she said she couldnt handle the relationship right now because mainly school and that she is too young to be in something serious and wants to have more experiences before that.. (we are both 16). i cant make the “no contact rule” because we are in the same class too.. what do you think about all this? please help me because im in a very very sad mood for 2 months.. (she broke up with me 2 months ago and i tried to not speak to her etc). Thanks, ah and sorry for my bad english, im portuguese.

    1. +César Ramos Your case is one of the exceptions to the “no contact” rule. I’ve discussed it in these videos, as well as how to handle it: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zKhNHhEmYMg and https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ydeES3WU1Uc  so whatever the case may be, try not to take things too seriously now since you may be in a period of growth and lots of changes. Focus on your studies instead, all right? Take care!

    2. I can across this video on Secret Fixer Blueprint – there’s lots awesome videos there that may help you

  4. hey brad this is off topic but my bf recently broke up with me about one week ago because since we’re having exams soon and family stuff he just needs time and doesn’t have time for a gf right now but we’ve been texting and kinda flirting I tried the no contact but it’s hard I have 3rd period with him (we’re in high school) and we always like look at eachother and text there but I’m not sure if I should continue the texting or if the no contact will work with my situation also if it has to be 30 days please I need your help

    1. +April Paniagua Your case is one of the exceptions to the “no contact” rule. I’ve discussed it in these videos, as well as how to handle it: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zKhNHhEmYMg and https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ydeES3WU1Uc but whatever the case may be, try not to take things too seriously now since you may be in a period of growth and lots of changes. Focus on your studies instead, all right? Take care!

  5. Brad, I bought you mend the marriage program, it’s been almost 3 weeks since she said she wished a trial separation. Initially I was quite upset and cried and begged a bit. She has agreed to counselling but has yet the make the appointment ( I asked her as a way to show me she’s committed to the idea). She’s moving at the start of May on a 6 month lease. I have now accepted it, am trying to be positive and optimistic. As we still live together how do I go about limiting conversation ect, or is that even wise to do?

    1. +Luke Oilboy Limiting conversations, yes, just to take timeout for yourself, can be healthy. Just be sure it won’t appear forced or that you’re purposefully avoiding her, that would be mighty awkward. Follow the book down to a tee, all right? Have you read through everything yet? I suggest doing so, and then going over it per chapter, as you progress… Take care!

  6. Hey Brad, My wife recently came in on emergency leave for the army her brother was in an accident. While in ait for the army she had an affair with another solder. Im currently trying to better myself in the things i was doing wrong like your book said to. I know that ive made improvement in my odds because her brother has given me updates on what shes feeling but im not sure now that she has had to go back to post, how i will be able to continue to win her back while she is now there with the other guy that she will not stop talking to. We have been together for 7 years and where happy before she left for basic training but it seems like it pushed her away before i had time that i was even doing something wrong. what do i need to do??

    1. +Blazeprime Sorry to hear about the breakup, man. And yes, follow the guide down to a tee, okay? It may be good NOT to receive updates from her brother, since that’ll only somehow put a damper in your progress and worrying yourself needlessly. You can only do so much. Focus on yourself and your own actions at this point. You can do it. Good luck, man!

  7. Hi Brad,thank God i found u!Youre a breath of fresh air right now for me!i badly need help!By the way ,let me 1st say u are extrmly good looking and just too decent!i am a mother of two cute kids .recently, my hubby went away just frustrated with some things goin on in the house and hasnt been backfor 21 days!there were problems in all these years but i never left the house!i admit that he also cooperated a lot regardng various things but he just didnt bother to stay!and by the way ,he has done this for the fourth time!he went away earlier and was back at my insistence and apology!the 2nd & 3rd time he came back ina day’s timebut in a similar pattern!let me also tell u that there were many instances of violence also but i anyhow ignored them for the sake of the family and many a tmes i too retaliated!now he has left and after all these days , due to some reason my mum contacted him it came to light that he may want to talk 2 me!i am totally shattetred emotionally(2 much!)that he left us for sch a long time and destroyed the marriage of 14 yrs in just a second!i do wnt him bk but with his head hung low and complete realisation of evrythng!pls hlp ASAP!

    1. +TITIKSHA BHATIA Thank you for the compliment! 🙂 Sorry to heart about the breakup, though… By the way, what were you apologising to him for? Be sure you don’t overdo it, especially if it’s not your fault to begin with….since ironically, it tends to lose its sincerity whenever you do. With that taken into consideration, it’s important to look at your situation from an objective perspective, which I know can be incredibly hard but nevertheless still possible; use the time away from him to do this! Try to stop talking to him since he clearly needs his space, for whatever reason. I wouldn’t know unless I get a better grasp of your situation first and help pinpoint details you may have missed. With relationships, the devil is in the details. This is where I come in. Sign up for my Mend the Marriage coaching program so I can help assess your situation clearly, look at all the other factors at play and see things you might have missed, then guide you accordingly on a regular, ongoing basis at www.marriageguy.com/coaching Okay? Talk soon!

  8. Hey brad, my wife and I been together for nines years now, but for the pass six years we been distant unattractive towards each other and still got married. She says she’s no longer in love with me so, I’m going crazy because she not paying me no attention and our conversation is meaning on the phones social media, we we do talk it’s very dry and I don’t know her like I use too to even gain her interest, is your program made for both of us to watch?

    1. Hi Jarren, sorry to hear that. So you mean to say that you’ve been distant more than you’ve been close in your marriage? What’s causing all this to happen? I can’t pass any judgment about your situation, man, since 9 years is a long time and I am barely even seeing the tip of the iceberg. It’s important to back off and see the root cause of your issues in the marriage. What’s with the distance? Did you mean emotional distance or physical distance? Sign up for my Mend the Marriage coaching program so I can help take a look at all the other factors at play and find out what’s really going on, monitor your situation, and guide you on a regular, ongoing basis at http://www.marriageguy.com/coaching Talk soon!

  9. I fell into a very state of deep depression from june 2015-sept 2016. My husband is in the military and I had a miscarriage and didn’t know how to handle it. He loved me through it all, UNTIL this year. From May-August my husband was severely overworked. He worked so much that he didn’t even have time for himself much less our marriage. We were perfectly find before this all started. I after just two weeks i noticed my husband was extremely short tempered. He would scream at me at the top of his lungs for no reason sometimes. During this period of time he had two break downs. My husband never once had a break down, or even cried in front of me until he joined the military. I literally watched the life get sucked out of him and i was still depressed, and just holding onto the fact that it would all end soon. Then when the season ended, and his time was about to be freed up a little he told me he wanted a divorce. I truly believe that he is depressed. He doesn’t wanna do counseling. We saw a counselor twice and he wouldn’t go anymore. He started hanging out with these guys that he usually couldn’t stand, he is not himself at all, i don’t even recognize him. Then i found out he was going on dates with this girl, when i confronted him, he said she didn’t mean anything to him, but he felt like his life is falling apart at the seams and he didn’t know what to do anymore. I don’t know how to take your videos because we had tragedy, and mental illness in our marriage. I don’t know what to do. I know my marriage is fixable, but he is not in his right state of mind right now. I feel as though he is not happy with life, and looking for someone to blame, and i am the only one around, it HAS to be me not making him happy

    1. You’re not in a marriage so you can make him happy, it’s supposed to be a partnership. So in a sense, he is responsible for his own happiness as much as you are. Anyway yes, I agree, there seems to be a lot going on here. Consider signing up for my Mend the Marriage coaching program so I can help take a look at all the other factors at play and find out what’s really going on, monitor your situation, and guide you on a regular, ongoing basis at www.marriageguy.com/coaching

  10. Hi when your husband keeps cheating on you but you want to save the relationship at all cost.i tried to understand him but it’s not easy.he says he love to be a free man

    1. Sorry to hear that. Majority would decide to just move on for good and start afresh with someone else, but a few would still fight for the relationship, so this all depends which side you’re on and what your views are. There is no right or wrong answer here because it is your relationship and it’s personal to you. Make sense? Anyway men and women cheat for different reasons, but if you think your ex is worth it and if there’s been a genuine connection between you two before the cheating happened, then try to see the roles that you BOTH played that led to all this mess and see once and for all if it can be resolved or not, okay? Really take your time before deciding though and be sure not to make any hasty decisions from an emotional place. Take care!

  11. My husband says he feels smothered and I feel neglected. He has even moved to the couch and intimacy has stopped. I am not sure what the real reason is but I hate the sadness, coldness and distance this has created.

    1. Sorry to hear that. When did you first notice this all happening? These may help: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WU0yhd3ADXU and https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W_vzHFqnasM&t=7s but it’s really challenging for me to know where to give you a headstart, knowing only so little of the situation… Sign up for my Mend the Marriage coaching program so I can help take a look at all the other factors at play and find out what’s really going on, monitor your situation, and guide you on a regular, ongoing basis at www.marriageguy.com/coaching

  12. my husband moved out a week ago. we have two children together and one on the way in 11 weeks. I blamed all the issues on him and have self image issues and was jealous and got mad alot. Everytime I say anything about talking bout things he just replies no. He was going work things out 2 days after he left then went to work and changed his mind. what can I do to get him to at least consider it and come home?

    1. It must be the hormones acting up.Give him time and just leave him be, okay? The more you force things, the more he’s likely gonna run. Let him come home on his own accord. Since you’re expecting, then he’d likely come back home soon, hopefully. I know handling things like this is never easy, and this is why I’ve released a second book called Mend the Marriage. Check it out at  http://www.marriageguy.com  as everything is on there, from how to communicate more effectively, down to how to handle the kids, monitor your progress through worksheets and stuff. These videos are for you, too:  http://y2u.be/ij6__SVcMW8  and http://y2u.be/z262BzLvwAk or sign up for my Mend the Marriage coaching program at http://www.marriageguy.com/coaching Take care!

    1. Brad Browning, we are still legally married, have children together, live 2 hours apart (kid swap every other weekend) and have still been secretly “seeing” each other over the last 4 yrs. I recently had a miscarriage that was his.

  13. This is great! This feels so one sided but once you said it will be all on me in the beginning, I feel so much better now. My actions show louder than words.

    1. Does he know you don’t like him anymore? 🙂 Try to be more specific with what you don’t like about him, perhaps it’s not all doom and gloom and he can still do something about it.

  14. Brad, my wife and I have been married for 15 years and have 3 children together, recently she told me she is not happy in our marriage and we need to work on us, I suggested counseling and she agreed. Every time I feel like I am reconnecting with her she somehow hurts my feeling mainly by not appreciating my efforts I get upset and try to talk to her about were we are headed and end up shooting myself in the foot. All this happened before I found your channel so now I know everything I have instinctually been doing is the wrong thing and keeps repelling her farther away. We still live and sleep together and share house and children responsibilities but intimacy has gone away and she has told me she is not really attracted to me anymore and we have become more like roommates lately. She told me I need to work on me because she thinks I’m not strong enough emotionally right now, so I have taken her advise and your videos of giving her space time to work on myself. Neither of us has cheated and no plans of separation yet, but I fear if I can not start attracting her again soon without the intimacy of our former relationship she will not want to stay with me. I am on your email list and may buy you program this week.

    1. Sorry to hear that, man. Women lose attraction slowly. It’s a gradual decrease. So let me ask you this: When did all the trouble started and what has caused it? These are my top two marriage videos which may help: http://y2u.be/WU0yhd3ADXU and http://y2u.be/W_vzHFqnasM but it’s really challenging for me to know where to give you a headstart, knowing only so little of the situation… Sign up for my Mend the Marriage coaching program so I can help take a look at all the other factors at play and find out what’s really going on, monitor your situation, and guide you on a regular, ongoing basis at http://www.marriageguy.com/coaching

    1. Getting married versus staying single has its own pros and cons. So it depends on everyone’s preference! 🙂

  15. I am a really nice considerate person to my wife
    Ever since she kicked me out I’ve changed those ways of me being open to anything being able to try everything
    I pay more close attention
    Interact with her and basically everything you’re saying and she still doesn’t want me
    She forces me to understand that her heart is no longer in this and that her heart wants to be alone

    1. How exactly have you approached this? It’s important NOT to make her feel like you’re trying too hard. Also try to see why she kicked you out in the firs place and the issues that’s been plaguing your marriage. The process is a bit complicated but this is why I’ve released a second book called Mend the Marriage. Check it out at http://www.marriageguy.com as everything is on there, from how to communicate more effectively, down to how to handle the kids (if applicable), monitor your progress through worksheets and stuff. These videos are for you, too: http://y2u.be/ij6__SVcMW8 and http://y2u.be/z262BzLvwAk or sign up for my Mend the Marriage coaching program at http://www.marriageguy.com/coaching Take care!

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