“Is My Marriage Over?” 5 Signs Your Marriage Is Doomed

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"Is My Marriage Over?" 5 Signs Your Marriage Is Doomed
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What’s up ladies and gentlemen, I’m Brad Browning and you’re watching my latest and greatest relationship advice video…. And this particular video is going to be one that’s specifically for anyone who is worried that their marriage is on the brink of collapse. If you’re worried about divorce, if you’re wondering whether your marriage is doomed, or if you want to know whether there’s still hope to turn things around before it’s too late… well, keep watching!

OK, now, let’s dive into the 5 signs of an impending divorce….

The first sign of trouble in a marriage is CRITICISM or COMPLAINING. Essentially, this refers to situations where one partner gets upset at the actions or behaviour of their spouse, and places the blame on them or their personality. For instance, let’s say you aren’t really the type to help out much with housework, and rarely clean up the kitchen after dinner…. If your spouse responded by saying, “You never help with the dishes. You’re such a lazy slob,” then that would the type of criticism that often indicates an unhealthy marriage.

Secondly, and this one often goes hand in hand with criticism, sign #2 is DEFENSIVENESS. So if we stick with the example I just mentioned, where your spouse calls you a “lazy slob,” a defensive reaction would be if you said in response, “Give me a break, you’re such a mess in the kitchen.. If I cooked dinner there would barely be any dishes at all.” In other words, defensiveness is when one spouse responds to their partner’s critical remarks by turning things around and attempting to shift the blame back on their partner.

Sign #3 that a marriage is heading for divorce is CONTEMPT. Now the word “contempt” can mean a lot of things, but in this case it’s basically any time one partner has a negative opinion of their spouse, and believes themselves to be superior… so, for instance, statements like “you’re a moron” or “you’re just clueless aren’t you” are both good examples of this sort of toxic contempt. In fact, this is actually what researchers believe to be the single biggest predictor of divorce… so, this is one that you really want to address immediately if it becomes an issue in your marriage.

And lastly, sign #4 is pretty straightforward… it’s EMOTIONAL WITHDRAWAL or “stonewalling”. In other words, if your partner simply becomes distant and doesn’t really appear to be listening or taking in what you’re saying when you try to bring up a point of contention or a complaint. This is often associated with men, and studies have shown that around 85% of the time it’s the male partner who is guilty of emotionally withdrawing. Sometimes this is because men are unwilling to confront problems or accept their partner’s criticism, and sometimes more a result of his wife having unfair or unreasonable expectations or bringing up the topic in a “nagging” sort of way. Regardless, whether it’s the man or woman who is doing the stonewalling, it’s bad news for a the future of any marriage when it happens regularly.

An unhealthy marriage, on the other hand, tends to have a lot more of those “negative” encounters for every “positive” interaction. Basically, if you and your spouse get along and enjoy one another’s company the vast majority of the time… and you only argue or get upset at one another once in a while, then your marriage has a healthy ratio of positive to negative encounters.

Unfortunately, for a lot of you watching this right now, your ratio is probably far lower than that ideal 5:1 ratio that researchers have found to be the magic number for the typical happy marriage. Relax, though… don’t panic quite yet, folks, even if you recognized all 5 of these signs in your own marriage. For most of you, you could very well be able to avoid divorce and dramatically improve the dynamics of your marriage before it’s too late.

How do you do that? Well, that’s a big topic that I can’t cover here… of course one of my first recommendations is to register for my best-selling Mend the Marriage program, which you can try risk-free for 60 days, immediately. The program is basically a comprehensive guide to turning your relationship around — even if your spouse is unwilling to put in the effort, or has already said they want a divorce — and it will give you a clear plan to put the marriage back on the right track. You can get all the details and sign up at my website, www.MarriageGuy.com.

I sincerely hope that this video is going to help some of you save your marriage while you still can… it’s a tough situation to be in, so I sympathize with anyone who is facing a marriage on the brink. If you have a quick question or feedback, leave a comment below and I’ll get back to you…. But, that’s it for now, see you in the next video!

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88 thoughts on ““Is My Marriage Over?” 5 Signs Your Marriage Is Doomed

    1. This is so true… I made this mistake of overlooking these two things and now I am married only for 2 years and I am already considering divorce.

    2. @criminozs Aww… Sending my love n hugs to you dear… May god guide you and bless you with peace and happiness and all the love you deserve. To brighten your day I am sharing my experience… I shared this with my husband that I wanted a divorce… He was devastated… He literally din eat or drink water for over 24 hours n was in shock… He din throw any tantrums, but was simply sobbing n was in shock… Later I spoke my mind and told him everything that I felt was wrong in our relationship… My in laws were troubling me n my husband loves them so much that he always took their side n I felt as if I was married only to be tortured here… I felt lonely… As soon as I told him I won’t divorce him only if he reconsiders my place in his life… N to my luck he saw the real faces of my in laws… Right now we are happy as he realised his mistake… I am sharing this with you as I know wat u must be going through.. please speak ur heart out n if he genuinely cares he will make efforts to mend things between you 2 or else you have ur answer… Good luck sweetheart… U r a strong woman n there are people who love and care for you ❤️🤗

    3. @Kajal Rai
      I’m a man. Married since 2 years. For me it’s more of verbal and emotional abuse. I have talked my wife about it. But it seems as if she can’t help it. Secondly I’m never good enough for her. Actually nothing is never good enough for her. She doesn’t like how she looks she doesn’t like how I look. She is what’s the point of this life. For 2 years I have been trying to motivate her and be kind to her but she only concentrates on the negative side of life. She is never truly happy no matter what. She doesn’t want to have kids she says that’s the point of bringing kids into this world and who will take care of them, it’s a lot of work she says and she can’t do it. Same goes for intimacy she says it’s a lot of work.
      Now I’m tired and run out of patience.

      Thank you for the kind words and wishes. Best of luck to you.

    1. Yep.
      Same here.
      Found out the hard way about what my married friends told me was going to happen eventually in a marriage.
      8 years.
      No intimacy of any kind.
      I could just shoot myself for getting married.

    2. Helena Phoenix – The thing is, Helena, women can easily leave a marriage … they do in droves every day. Men … not so much. Divorce for men is usually soul crushing and financially devastating. So … if you’re a woman and you’ve changed your mind about the man you married the solution is simple … divorce!

  1. Hey can you make a video about
    “what’s to do next after no contact period of end”
    Cus I’M doing no contact its been 5 days and its hard

  2. I’ve only been married 7 months and I’m already heading there I found out I’m being used and not wanted and he said I’m not attractive

    1. I’ve been married for over a month and we’ve had more arguments than happy times. He is insecure and I feel like I have to walk on eggshells around him, I dread when we are both off from work. Most of the times he acts like the woman in the marriage, I no longer have the desire of being in the marriage, but I also don’t want to give up…. I’m lost right now

    1. I’m struggled through the last half of my 16 yr marriage. Not a lot in common but 4 kids. I’m 39 yr old male and honestly stumbled into a friend co worker relationship with. A perfect fit for me. I need one of those Blk 8ball you shake and tells the future … please help drowning

  3. I’ve only been married for 8 years and I can honestly say that I’ll never get married again and I’m only 40

    1. @TCG Bros yep and the only way I’ll see myself getting married again is if that I’m an old man who doesn’t wanna die alone but other that there are too many single women out there to be tied down with one

    1. Had to give up an 01 Mustang and a 77 Camaro because of my wife (currently seperated) due to her not keeping a job and spending too much money. I know how you feel.

  4. Divorce is the best way to end an argument with your spouse 😂😂😂😂. That’s what I what I did, I won.
    Unfortunately we got married again so jokes on me.

    1. You’re having an epiphany there, Mike? That’s good, awareness is key! However, if things seem hopeless and you’re wanting to save the marriage on your own, my clients found their peace by having applied the tips similar to the ones I mentioned on these videos: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F1nFUvtof7Y  AND  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lvH0STXVqdI  If you’re still having trouble, consider signing up for my Mend the Marriage coaching program so I can help take a look at all the other factors at play and find out what’s really going on, monitor your situation, and guide you on a regular, ongoing basis at http://www.marriageguy.com/coaching

  5. My marriage is going over. i have not enjoy it throughout the past 5 years.its soooo bad
    only staying for my kid. i believe one day i move out May God help me

  6. Maybe it’s me on my third marriage,not too happy it’s a strain I must admit I should have never gotten married more sadness then happiness.

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